Monday’s Reflections of Sunday


I was thinking about how great yesterday was. I can’t help but be very thankful to God for all He did yesterday.

In the 9 A.M. Men’s Bible Group, we started a new study using the book, “Redefining Life: For Men.” In the last 2 years I’ve lead this group, we had good studies. Some were DVD based studies and most were small group studies to develop discussions. By far this one is the best we’ve done. God is truly blessing this group because the men are growing in their walk with God. Not only is the group maturing, but more men are checking us out. We had 7 men in the group yesterday with 2 more men planning to join us next week. These men are wanting to grow in their walk and be the leaders of their families. It’s an honor to be able to lead them.

Just before the morning service Satan was acting out. Nothing was looking good. Our senior pastor was out and the multi-media projector was not at the church yet. It arrived 5 minutes after the service started. As the worship leader was leading the music, I set it up and tried to open the Power Point slides but it wouldn’t open. I thought to myself, we’re doing the worship old school. The great part about this is that God’s spirit was manifested during the music portion of the worship hour. He was present during the preaching part of it as well. Having music on the screen is cool but it’s not the end all. God is the end all.

After the morning service, Teresa and I were able to hang out with our friends at Rudy Tuesday’s. It was a great time of fellowship and getting to know our best friend’s new girlfriend. We met her last week and this was more time to get to know her. She loves the Lord and wants to serve Him just like Gil does. I left feeling energized. It was fun, and of course as I shared in yesterday’s post we bought new cell phones. That was a great way to end the day serving our Lord.

I hope God was able to use you on Sunday.

New Toys

Today after church and lunch, Teresa and I went to Best Buy and bought new cell phones. We got blackberries. It's fun to have new toys. OK, actually these will be great tools for the ministry. The only thing about new phones is reading the manual. The coolest items are the camcorder with this phone and we can surf the world wide web. We're charging them now. God is good because with everything, 2 cell phones, car charger, 2 phone clips, and 2 blue tooth head sets came to less than $500. Before all the discounts the price looked like it would be almost $1,500. God is good all the time and all them time God is good.

When We Feel Like Faking It



Studying the new study for the men's group I lead, I saw this and wanted to share with you. I like this so much I ordered the book from Christianbooks.com. It makes you think; at least it made me think on how I act around others.


From “TrueFaced: Truth God and Others with Who You Really Are”

The ancient Greeks loved their theater. It was the Broadway of the Appian Way. But their immense outdoor amphitheaters had some built-in problems. People in the back row could not see the actors’ faces, let alone their expressions. So some director came up with the idea of having the actors deliver their lines behind giant masks.
All the actors held a pole that carried an enormous papier-mâché mask that portrayed their predominant nature – good or evil. The mask was always a caricature – an overdone, generalized, or idealized portrayal. If the playwright wanted to show that a character had changed during the play, that actor’s mask was traded for another. But the actors never revealed their true faces. Throughout the play, they all acted out their roles behind a façade. These performers were not called actors, but hypocrites, literally, “one who wears a mask.” A hypocrite was one who continually wore masks and whose face the audience never saw.
A great mechanism for ancient Greek theater. A tragic mechanism for people who hunger to be known and loved in the light of day.
We are all performers, and like the actors in ancient Greece, we don’t show our true faces. Because of sin, we’ve lost confidence that we will always please our audience, so we feel compelled to hide and put on a mask.
We have dozens of masks in our wardrobes, including:

The "happy: mask
The "I'm better than most" mask
The "I'm very together" mask
The "I don't care" mask
The "I'm very important" mask
The "I'm the expert" mask

Thank You Leaf



This afternoon I was able to help out a new Church Planter who just moved in to the area. Jamie drove from Fredericksburg to Norfolk and Mark, Chris, and I helped him and his brother-in-law (Mark) move the stuff into the apartment that he and his wife are renting. It’s a nice apartment in an older house. Jamie is creating a new ministry to Old Dominion University students. His apartment is only a mile and half form the campus. It was good to be able to help out.
To say thank you, Jamie’s 4 year old boy handed us a leaf as we stood around saying good bye. It was cool that he gave it to us. He’s a cute kid.

God Is Not Carman

I preached on the topic of Obedience not too long ago. I wanted to illustrate some people’s view on God and why we must obey Him. I choose a You Tube video clip from a South Park episode where the character Carmen tried to be the Police authority of the town. Carman would use the nightstick he had to hit people in the knees and shins yelling, “You will obey my authority!” Some people think that God is in heaven with thunder bolts in hand ready to strike you down because you aren’t obeying Him and that He is power hungry (like Carman) and that’s why we have the 10 Commandments.

If you are a parent, you will understand this idea a little better. God has the commands in place for our benefit. Just like our parents won’t allow us to cross the street alone when we were little and/or not allow us to play with a hot burner, God has set these rules in place to keep us from harm. If you crossed the street alone, you were in danger of being hit my car, and it you played with the hot burner you could have been burned. Parents know the dangers where little children do not.

God knows better than we when it comes to the dangers of this world. He doesn’t want us to destroy our health so He says be sexually pure. Being sexually pure will keep you from getting a STD. God says not to be drunk with wine (or other types of liquor) so we won’t destroy our livers. God says not to lust after your neighbor’s spouse so will be will keep our mental life healthy.

Just as walking across the street alone as a child may get you hit by a car, going against what God says will cause damage to you either physically and/or spiritually. God sets these rules or commands in place for our benefit. Where Carman was out for people to obey his authority because he wanted the power, God has the authority and uses it as a parent uses it to take care of their children.

Think about it.

Safety & Provision

On Friday night, I was driving home from a business dinner and my truck died on I 264. When I left the restaurant, I noticed the battery light on. I thought that’s not good. I was planning on getting the truck served anyway so I was going to get it looked at over the weekend. On the way home, I felt the AC not cooling and thought, “That’s weird.” As I’m thinking this, I see another light come on and the speedometer go down; I lost power. I was on the far right lane anyway so I pulled off the interstate. I sat there thinking, “This is just great. Now what?” After about a 5 minute span of praying and thinking, I turned the key. The truck started so I praised the Lord. But after less than a mile, the truck died again.

I called Teresa and she came to get me. It took her about 20 minutes so I stood less than 5 feet away from a major through way to the a major beach vacation spot. Car after car just sped by. I was thanking God for not allowing me to be in the middle of the downtown Norfolk tunnel when the truck died. You see, the truck isn’t mind. The truck belongs to God; I just get to manage it. When Teresa arrived, I was claim and she noticed. I told her that it wouldn’t do to get mad because things happen. It will work out.

On Saturday, I called a towing company and we carried the truck to a nearby Ford dealership. I will be able to pick it up after work today. With replacing the alternator and 4 new tires (apparently I need new ones), the grant total is over $800. I have no worries about the bill. God has blessed us and He will continue to bless us. I will pay the bill and drive God’s truck to our Monday night Discovery Group praising Him all the way.

Iron Sharpening Iron

In the last 2 weeks, I’ve been seeing and talking with one of the men who attend the weekly men’s group I lead at the gym. This man has grown the last 2 years and I enjoy talking with him. He just started a new job at a nearby car dealership so he works out at the same place I do now. It’s nice talking with him in passing. I talked with him today about me meeting up with him at his place of business to talk. The dealership has a café for their employees and we will try to hook up next week.

I enjoy meeting with people and having either a meal or coffee with them. I enjoy the conversation and it’s a great chance to see who they are outside of church. These meetings allow them to see me outside of church as well. I’m who I am no matter where I go. What you see is what you get with me (good, bad, or indifferent), but some people think as a preacher we’re different than other people. Granted, most preachers are different but that’s not because they’re preachers; it’s just because they are weird ; - ).

Building this type of closeness with my men, allows me to sharpen them in their walk. As the Bible says, as iron sharpens iron brothers in the Lord are to sharpen each others walk (I’m paraphrasing it). Men are men, no matter what their background is. Most guys don’t like coming to church or the idea of church because they are afraid of being demanned (a made up word). It’s my mission to let the men God sends me know that Jesus was a man’s man when He was on Earth. I think talking with this guy in the middle of bench press sets or curls, he sees a regular guy who loves the Lord and cares for him and his family.

Principle’s Office

I only was sent maybe 3 times to the principle’s office in my 12 years of school, but I remember the feeling of, “What did I do to reserve this?” feeling. That feeling hit me yesterday. I sent an e-mail with some ideas and questions to the southeastern SBCV Church Plant Strategist and his reply was, “Sounds like it is time for more coffee. What does your schedule look like?” My first thought was, “Why and what did I write to cause this meeting?” The coffee is because we meet at a coffeehouse near our homes.

I always enjoy the time that Mark and I spend talking over coffee and feel encouraged afterward. I think it’s funny that after being 19 years since the last time I had to go to the principle’s office, my mind remembers the feeling. I look forward to the meeting.

Target Group

While learning the ins and outs of church planting, the term “target group” has been used a lot. I heard in the seminary I attended and have read the term in the books I’ve read. I’ve never been asked who my target group is with us planting a church in Carrollton. Are we looking to target the Gen Xers which Teresa and I are part of? Are we looking to target the down and outers, the Baby Boomers, or the post-moderate generation? The answer to these questions is, yes. We are planning to spread the seed of the gospel to everywhere and to every type of people. We are trusting God to lead people He wants us to reap from the harvest.

The one group I have always been passionate to reach is “Men.” If you press me on what is our target group, I would have to say, “Men.” If you lead the head of the house to the Lord, the rest of the family will attend church with him. There are a lot of stats that point to the importance of the fathers coming to church that affects the sons continuing to attending after graduation, and that affect on the mothers and daughters. I’ve worked in the men’s ministry for almost 10 years now and when the man growing in the Lord, the wives are encouraged and the family is grounded.

There is a church in Tampa, FL (Church @ The Bay) is totally focused on reaching men. From their website to the layover of their church (including color scheme), it’s all geared to reach men. I’ve trading e-mails with the senior pastor and he has shared with me that the women are very grateful for this because their man is coming to church and grow in their walk.

You reach the man and the family will come with him. Reach the man, and you can reach a generation. My “target group” is the men that God leads to me. It’s all about pointing people to Christ and He changes them. I want to be part of change a generation of men.

Smoky Joe’s

Last night I had dinner with a friend at a BBQ place in Carrollton called Smoky Joe’s. The food was awesome and the place was cool. As Gil and I talked and enjoyed the food, I looked around and saw the different people who were eating. This is a neighborhood type place so the people eating were people who live nearby. I have to admit, I ate there to see if it could be a possible place to connect with the community. The food will cause me to come back. The food and the desire to connect with the Smoky Joe’s people will make it a regular watering hole.

The layout of the place is perfect for a church gathering. There is a stage in the corner with its own sound system for live music. The tables can be moved to set up chairs. I’m praying that God will open this place for a Sunday morning gathering. The idea of worshipping God in a place that Jesus would spend time in to me is ideal. The place is a bar that serves great food. Having church in a bar is an awesome idea to me. I’m praying that this desire is the one God has for us to do for Him. If it is, He will open the door wide.

Community

This past weekend I created a Facebook account. It’s only been 4 days and I have over 20 “friends” on my account. Teresa saw this and created her own on Sunday and she has over 20 “friends” on hers. It’s a neat tool to get reconnected with people we know but have loss contact with and to meet new people. The other well known community based website “My Space” will take too much of my time to maintain but I have thought about creating an account there as well. I’ve been thinking about why these sites are so popular and I think it has to do with people wanting to feel that they belong to a community.

I watched a few weeks ago a show on MTV (yes I watch MTV from time to time) called “Real Life . . .” Each episode covers different subjects that affect people and how they handle it. This one followed 3 young ladies who all used the internet to make friends, date, and/or be part of a community but they were either uncomfortable or unwilling to do the same in real life situations. Teresa told me that the episode made her sad because these young women didn’t have much of a life other than their computer.

People are longing to be part of something. We all want to feel loved and appreciated. It saddens me that the church isn’t the place for that for people. The church has failed to be a community of people who love. Jesus tells us that the world will know that we are Christ-followers by the way we love. The church should be a community of people who love one another and the lost, encourage one another, hold each other account for our actions (good or bad), and equip each other to grow in our walk with Christ.

There is a movement out there of believers who are tired of the way church is run and are leaving. They aren’t leaving Christ but the church. There is no way for a believer to be healthy on there own without a community of like-minded people. Community is important to the health of us all. If you aren’t connected to a community of Christ-followers, I would suggest you get connected for your well being.

Running and Finishing

On Saturday, 5/31 I ran in my first 5K Run. It was awesome. I did alright for my first run and being 38 years old; finished in 28 minutes and 38 second (averaging 9 min and 14 seconds per mile). As I ran through the park and neighborhood, I allowed my mind just wonder so I wouldn’t think too much about keeping my breathing in pace with my legs. As I looked around at the other runners and the people who lined the course, I thought about how similar it was to the Christian race.
There were all sorts of people running. Some were young and some older. Everyone had their own pace. Most of the people had the goal to just run and finish the race. The by-standers were yelling encouragements to the runners to keep running. I saw 2 teenage boys pass me and I thought about their pace and it wouldn’t hold up and sure enough I passed them walking to catch their breath.
The Christian race is not a sprint, but an endurance race. We are to set the pace early on so we can run the whole thing. As with the race on Saturday, it was alright to walk for awhile so you can get your breath and study your legs. I know that the by-standers yelling encouragements helped me keep my pace and I know that the “crowd of witnesses” that the Bible talks about helps me keep focused on my pace in the Christian race. To me, it wasn’t about trying to win on Saturday it was about finishing. As long as we finish strong or just finish the Christian race, we are winners.
How’s your pace in your race? You getting tired and weary? Just walk for a while and get your strength back and keep on keeping on.

Example of Grace

Yesterday I posted about a young man in our church who had to go before a judge because of the fight he got into at school. I saw him last night and we were able to talk. I could tell by his body language that things went well. The judge dismissed the charges as long as he continues to do well in school (he gets straight A’s). He didn’t have to do community serve and the fight will not be put I his permanent record. It’s as if this has never happened. This is true grace.

Former Creep with a Prayer Need

On Monday and Wednesday nights, we have a group who meet at the church for prayer; just to pray. Last night, I was leading this group who has no more than 4 people in total on a good night. I met one of the men early for dinner and he and I were at the church by 6:45; the prayer time starts at 7. The normal leader for Wednesday night’s group wasn’t coming so I figured it would just be me and Gil. At 7 pm the door opened it was one of our teenagers. I know this young man only by first name and the fact he is 6ft 4 inches tall and only 14 years old. I call this young man wall with legs (very big boy). I thought it was cool he came to prayer group.

The next 30 minutes that followed was very interesting. Gil and I got to hear all about this young man’s background. You see the reason he came to prayer group is to seek prayer for himself. He had gotten into a fight on Tuesday during the school day and is suspended for 5 days. Added to that, he has to go in front of a judge today (at 5pm) because of the fight. The reason he has to go in front of a judge is because he has a record from when he lived in GA.

Before coming to Christ, this young man was a Creep and was in gang for several years. I let him talk for about 10 minutes while Gil asks questions. The type of questions a white person asks a black person about life on the street. I knew most of the answers because of being a youth pastor I Richmond, VA, but this was the young man’s story to tell. Long story shorted, we prayed for this young man along with the other prayer needs. I made sure he left feeling loved and encouraged. I’ve been praying that grace will be given to this young man who has a big heart. He just allowed things to go too far on Tuesday. If you ready this before 5 pm on Thursday, 5/29 pray for this young man.

Vince Antonucci: Reaching Lost People (Jer. 4:1)
Today, churches are decreasing but spiritualism is on the rise
To reach lost people, we must plan to target lost people
We must go, say, and/or do anything (except sin) to reach lost people
Focus on reaching the lost and not churched people
If we aren’t close to people, we aren’t close to God

On Thursday, Teresa and I spent one day listening to 8 Godly men share a thought. I want to share what I got from each one.

Mark Batterson: God Ideas
Our best thoughts are still 3.5 billion light year miles from God’s thoughts
Our best discoveries will change when we discover new ones
Compared to what God has in store for us, we dream too small
We need to meet with God through prayer and dream
Through time we tend to stop creating dreams and start to repeat the past
My dreams are way too small
One God idea is better than hundreds of good ideas
NEVER STOP DREAMING!

Coaching Change

I’m reading the book “Coaching Change: Breaking Down Resistance, Building Up Hope” by Thomas G. Bandy. It's a good read. I want to share with you a portion that all of us in church work will benefit to know.
The below portion is from pages 58-59.
Coaches who model a winning faith demonstrate four qualities:

1. Long-term relationship. Coaches with a winning faith stay with a team through all the ups and downs of congregational life. They have long-term pastoral leadership. Achievements, or the lack of achievements, do not generate prideful complacency in the confidence of their own vocation and their ultimate acceptance of Christ
2. Tolerance of errors. Coaches with a winning faith show remarkable tolerance for the errors, foibles, and mistakes of the team members. Error is evidence of passion and opportunity to learn. Mistakes reveal the next steps in the quest for quality, but they do not undermine the intrinsic identity of the team as winners.
3. Uncompromising about growth. Coaches with a winning faith insist on constant growth for every team member. They are perfectionists in the sense that they are not satisfied unless every team member is playing to his or her fullest potential – and since that potential is unlimited, the coach is never satisfied. They drive themselves and the team in a continuous learning and discovery.
4. Desire for God. Coaches with a winning faith find their self-fulfillment in their relationship to God, not in the achievement of any short-tem goal. They yearn to shape their life, lifestyle, and liveliness around that relationship. They unite the readiness to surrender all for a loving God (agape love) with the deeply emotional desire to immerse themselves in a beloved God (erotikos love). They do not merely believe in God. They want to experience the divine.

Teresa

I don’t write near enough about my beautiful bride. Teresa is second in my life only after God Almighty. God Himself made Teresa just for me and He made me just for her. I am who I am partly because God putting Teresa in my life. She is my Proverbs 31 woman that I prayed for as a young teenage preacher boy. I will forever be grateful for Teresa.

About a month ago, Teresa and I enjoyed a day out with a friend. We spent almost 3 hours in this nice little coffeehouse after we enjoyed a great lunch at the Red Tavern in Newport News and before that we enjoyed a beautiful 5 mile hike around an awesome lake. While sitting and talking over coffee (me) and hot chocolate (for Teresa and Gil), we enjoyed some music. One of the CDs playing was Michael Buble. I enjoyed his music so much I bought the CD.

My favorite song on the CD is “Everything” because it makes me smile. The reason it makes me smile is because I think about Teresa. I’m smiling as I write this because I’m thinking of her now and I wish we were not at work but together. Below are the words to the song that I like so much. Enjoy.

You're a falling star, You're the get away car.
You're the line in the sand when I go too far.
You're the swimming pool, on an August day.
And you're the perfect thing to say.

And you play it coy, but it's kinda cute.
Ah, When you smile at me you know exactly what you do.
Baby don't pretend, that you don't know it's true.
Cause you can see it when I look at you.

[Chorus:]
And in this crazy life, and through these crazy times
It's you, it's you, You make me sing.
You're every line, you're every word, you're everything.

You're a carousel, you're a wishing well,
And you light me up, when you ring my bell.
You're a mystery, you're from outer space,
You're every minute of my everyday.

And I can't believe, uh that I'm your man,
And I get to kiss you baby just because I can.
Whatever comes our way, ah we'll see it through,
And you know that's what our love can do.

[Chorus:]
And in this crazy life, and through these crazy times
It's you, it's you, You make me sing
You're every line, you're every word, you're everything.

So, La, La, La, La, La, La, La
So, La, La, La, La, La, La, La

[Chorus:]
And in this crazy life, and through these crazy times
It's you, it's you, You make me sing.
You're every line, you're every word, you're everything.
You're every song, and I sing along.
'Cause you're my everything.
Yeah, yeah

So, La, La, La, La, La, La, La
So, La, La, La, La, La, La, La, La, La, La, La

Tiring Tuesdays

I’ve heard that Mondays are difficult for pastors. I used to work for a man that you didn’t talk to if you could help it on Monday mornings. If he called you into his office before 11 am, you needed a helmet (I kind you not). I know Mondays are a downer to a high energy day (Sundays). I’ve felt it in smaller portions when I preach on Sundays. I’m experiencing something completely different.

My tiring day is Tuesday. I felt it last week but I thought it was just because our first Monday evening Discovery Group wasn’t a big success (in my eyes). Last night went well, but I’m tired this morning; more so than usual. My thoughts are more negative even toward Church Planting. At first I thought it was a satanic attack, but I had it last week too. I think that Tuesdays will be difficult going forward like Mondays are for the pastors who do “church” on Sundays. Knowing this, I can be prayed up for it.

I’m still tired.

Mother's Day

Yesterday was Mother’s Day and we had my parents with us for the weekend. They live outside of Roanoke, VA so it was nice to see them. The drive is only 4 hours but with our jobs during the week plus the church planting, we can’t make it out there so they came to us. It was very cool to see the folks again. It’s been around 5 months since the last time we were together.

I’ve learned how to stop and just listen to people from my mom. My mom never really had anyone to just listen to her until one day way back about 8 years ago I just listened to her talk. It was eye opening to learn what I did about her and her past. Since that day, when we are together I always make it a point to just listen to her talk. It’s made our relationship better than it ever has been. I always look forward to listening to her when we get to be together. I hate talking on the phone so our phone conversations are less than 5 minutes so being together physically is always a treat. I have a cool mom.