Example of Grace

Yesterday I posted about a young man in our church who had to go before a judge because of the fight he got into at school. I saw him last night and we were able to talk. I could tell by his body language that things went well. The judge dismissed the charges as long as he continues to do well in school (he gets straight A’s). He didn’t have to do community serve and the fight will not be put I his permanent record. It’s as if this has never happened. This is true grace.

Former Creep with a Prayer Need

On Monday and Wednesday nights, we have a group who meet at the church for prayer; just to pray. Last night, I was leading this group who has no more than 4 people in total on a good night. I met one of the men early for dinner and he and I were at the church by 6:45; the prayer time starts at 7. The normal leader for Wednesday night’s group wasn’t coming so I figured it would just be me and Gil. At 7 pm the door opened it was one of our teenagers. I know this young man only by first name and the fact he is 6ft 4 inches tall and only 14 years old. I call this young man wall with legs (very big boy). I thought it was cool he came to prayer group.

The next 30 minutes that followed was very interesting. Gil and I got to hear all about this young man’s background. You see the reason he came to prayer group is to seek prayer for himself. He had gotten into a fight on Tuesday during the school day and is suspended for 5 days. Added to that, he has to go in front of a judge today (at 5pm) because of the fight. The reason he has to go in front of a judge is because he has a record from when he lived in GA.

Before coming to Christ, this young man was a Creep and was in gang for several years. I let him talk for about 10 minutes while Gil asks questions. The type of questions a white person asks a black person about life on the street. I knew most of the answers because of being a youth pastor I Richmond, VA, but this was the young man’s story to tell. Long story shorted, we prayed for this young man along with the other prayer needs. I made sure he left feeling loved and encouraged. I’ve been praying that grace will be given to this young man who has a big heart. He just allowed things to go too far on Tuesday. If you ready this before 5 pm on Thursday, 5/29 pray for this young man.

Vince Antonucci: Reaching Lost People (Jer. 4:1)
Today, churches are decreasing but spiritualism is on the rise
To reach lost people, we must plan to target lost people
We must go, say, and/or do anything (except sin) to reach lost people
Focus on reaching the lost and not churched people
If we aren’t close to people, we aren’t close to God

On Thursday, Teresa and I spent one day listening to 8 Godly men share a thought. I want to share what I got from each one.

Mark Batterson: God Ideas
Our best thoughts are still 3.5 billion light year miles from God’s thoughts
Our best discoveries will change when we discover new ones
Compared to what God has in store for us, we dream too small
We need to meet with God through prayer and dream
Through time we tend to stop creating dreams and start to repeat the past
My dreams are way too small
One God idea is better than hundreds of good ideas
NEVER STOP DREAMING!

Coaching Change

I’m reading the book “Coaching Change: Breaking Down Resistance, Building Up Hope” by Thomas G. Bandy. It's a good read. I want to share with you a portion that all of us in church work will benefit to know.
The below portion is from pages 58-59.
Coaches who model a winning faith demonstrate four qualities:

1. Long-term relationship. Coaches with a winning faith stay with a team through all the ups and downs of congregational life. They have long-term pastoral leadership. Achievements, or the lack of achievements, do not generate prideful complacency in the confidence of their own vocation and their ultimate acceptance of Christ
2. Tolerance of errors. Coaches with a winning faith show remarkable tolerance for the errors, foibles, and mistakes of the team members. Error is evidence of passion and opportunity to learn. Mistakes reveal the next steps in the quest for quality, but they do not undermine the intrinsic identity of the team as winners.
3. Uncompromising about growth. Coaches with a winning faith insist on constant growth for every team member. They are perfectionists in the sense that they are not satisfied unless every team member is playing to his or her fullest potential – and since that potential is unlimited, the coach is never satisfied. They drive themselves and the team in a continuous learning and discovery.
4. Desire for God. Coaches with a winning faith find their self-fulfillment in their relationship to God, not in the achievement of any short-tem goal. They yearn to shape their life, lifestyle, and liveliness around that relationship. They unite the readiness to surrender all for a loving God (agape love) with the deeply emotional desire to immerse themselves in a beloved God (erotikos love). They do not merely believe in God. They want to experience the divine.

Teresa

I don’t write near enough about my beautiful bride. Teresa is second in my life only after God Almighty. God Himself made Teresa just for me and He made me just for her. I am who I am partly because God putting Teresa in my life. She is my Proverbs 31 woman that I prayed for as a young teenage preacher boy. I will forever be grateful for Teresa.

About a month ago, Teresa and I enjoyed a day out with a friend. We spent almost 3 hours in this nice little coffeehouse after we enjoyed a great lunch at the Red Tavern in Newport News and before that we enjoyed a beautiful 5 mile hike around an awesome lake. While sitting and talking over coffee (me) and hot chocolate (for Teresa and Gil), we enjoyed some music. One of the CDs playing was Michael Buble. I enjoyed his music so much I bought the CD.

My favorite song on the CD is “Everything” because it makes me smile. The reason it makes me smile is because I think about Teresa. I’m smiling as I write this because I’m thinking of her now and I wish we were not at work but together. Below are the words to the song that I like so much. Enjoy.

You're a falling star, You're the get away car.
You're the line in the sand when I go too far.
You're the swimming pool, on an August day.
And you're the perfect thing to say.

And you play it coy, but it's kinda cute.
Ah, When you smile at me you know exactly what you do.
Baby don't pretend, that you don't know it's true.
Cause you can see it when I look at you.

[Chorus:]
And in this crazy life, and through these crazy times
It's you, it's you, You make me sing.
You're every line, you're every word, you're everything.

You're a carousel, you're a wishing well,
And you light me up, when you ring my bell.
You're a mystery, you're from outer space,
You're every minute of my everyday.

And I can't believe, uh that I'm your man,
And I get to kiss you baby just because I can.
Whatever comes our way, ah we'll see it through,
And you know that's what our love can do.

[Chorus:]
And in this crazy life, and through these crazy times
It's you, it's you, You make me sing
You're every line, you're every word, you're everything.

So, La, La, La, La, La, La, La
So, La, La, La, La, La, La, La

[Chorus:]
And in this crazy life, and through these crazy times
It's you, it's you, You make me sing.
You're every line, you're every word, you're everything.
You're every song, and I sing along.
'Cause you're my everything.
Yeah, yeah

So, La, La, La, La, La, La, La
So, La, La, La, La, La, La, La, La, La, La, La

Tiring Tuesdays

I’ve heard that Mondays are difficult for pastors. I used to work for a man that you didn’t talk to if you could help it on Monday mornings. If he called you into his office before 11 am, you needed a helmet (I kind you not). I know Mondays are a downer to a high energy day (Sundays). I’ve felt it in smaller portions when I preach on Sundays. I’m experiencing something completely different.

My tiring day is Tuesday. I felt it last week but I thought it was just because our first Monday evening Discovery Group wasn’t a big success (in my eyes). Last night went well, but I’m tired this morning; more so than usual. My thoughts are more negative even toward Church Planting. At first I thought it was a satanic attack, but I had it last week too. I think that Tuesdays will be difficult going forward like Mondays are for the pastors who do “church” on Sundays. Knowing this, I can be prayed up for it.

I’m still tired.

Mother's Day

Yesterday was Mother’s Day and we had my parents with us for the weekend. They live outside of Roanoke, VA so it was nice to see them. The drive is only 4 hours but with our jobs during the week plus the church planting, we can’t make it out there so they came to us. It was very cool to see the folks again. It’s been around 5 months since the last time we were together.

I’ve learned how to stop and just listen to people from my mom. My mom never really had anyone to just listen to her until one day way back about 8 years ago I just listened to her talk. It was eye opening to learn what I did about her and her past. Since that day, when we are together I always make it a point to just listen to her talk. It’s made our relationship better than it ever has been. I always look forward to listening to her when we get to be together. I hate talking on the phone so our phone conversations are less than 5 minutes so being together physically is always a treat. I have a cool mom.

Genes

Yesterday, I had lunch with a dear friend. Tom was my youth pastor way back in the 1980’s. Tom and his family have recently moved back to the area and this is the first time we have been able to hook up. It was great to talk about how God is using him in his new church, and it was great sharing what God is doing with Teresa and me.

We talked about other men and women who were teens in the youth dept and what they are doing now. Tom shared with me that one of the men is having heart issues. I was surprised because Jon is a year younger than me; however, this heart issue runs in his family. Jon’s dad has had heart problems the entire time I’ve known him. Jon inherited his heart problem through his father’s genes.

This conversation made me think about how we can not choose what we get from our parents. The genes we get are the genes we get (good, bad, or indifferent). Since God is the creator, He decides our make up but no one else has any say.

When God draws us to Himself, He gives us His spiritual genes. As we grow in Him, we discover these genes and start using them to bring Him glory. Paul calls these genes the “Fruit of the Spirit” in Galatians 5:22-23. As Christ-followers we all have this fruit, but some don’t exercise it. It’s one fruit with multiple properties (But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.). Just as my blue eyes, red hair, and fare skin are gene traits from my mom and my nose, jaw line, and my temperament are gene traits from my dad, the fruit of the Spirit is a gene trait we have from our heavenly Father.

New Set of Eyes

I can’t see into the future; nor would I want to have the ability. I know the One who does know the future so I will trust in Him to have His way. It takes faith to see it this way. I’m reading the book of Job, and the main topic of the book is faith (according to Phillip Yancy in his book “The Bible Jesus Read”). Throughout the whole book of Job, Job is trusting in God’s greatness. Job has no idea that God is allowing Satan to test him to make a point. The faith that Job shows through the hardship of losing all this children, his wealth, and his health speaks volumes to his character.

Keeping my eyes on my Master and doing what I feel He is showing me to do takes getting a new set of eyes. I need a set of “faith eyes” so no matter what my human eyes see (good, bad, or indifferent) I trust in God and what He is doing. Planting a new church is so must harder than I could ever have imagined. I have a very good imagination, but this is kicking my butt. I know that God’s will be done as I keep my eyes on Him and follow His lead. I know God is the One who does, and I’m called to follow His lead so through faith I can see a church being formed in the Carrollton, VA area. It will take prayer, work, and time.

Through faith, I know God will send us helpers. Through faith, I know God will have His perfect will do with us. Through faith, we will glorify God in all of His doings. Keep us in your prayers as we keep our eyes on God and follow Him.

Transparency

I’ve heard most of my ministry life that familiarity breeds contempt. I’ve worked for and ministered with Sr. Pastors who held their members at arms length so they wouldn’t be “too” close with their people. I’ve learned that’s stupid. Be who you are and don’t try to be something or someone you’re not.

I quote this one college professor a lot because he is a very good teacher and has good quotes. When taking his Old Testament I and II classes, he would say, “Let’s put flesh and blood on these people.” The people that are in the Bible were just that, people. They weren’t any more holy than the other people; God just chose to use them. If you look closely, you’ll see all their faults.

Let’s face it, preachers aren’t perfect nor should we try to appear as perfect. Pastors put their pants on one leg at a time like everyone else. We succeed and fail like everyone else. I’m working with a guy who doesn’t even try not to be himself. His philosophy is I’m who I am, take me or leave me. He’s right on with this attitude and his members appreciate him for it. To me being transparency has helped my ministry with men. I share where I’ve failed and where I’ve succeeded, and some of my personal challenges. To disciple people is walking with them in their journey. We are all on the same road. We can use what we’ve learned to help others.

It’s alright to allow people to get to know you. God can use our transparency to minister to our people. I have examples of where me being transparent has help people wrestle with things in their lives and overcome them. Don’t be afraid to open up.